May 19, 2010

Shame, Shame!

In the last 10 years we have had many hit movies which made us squirm. We pick one for each year.

Housefull (2010): Well, it’s not a major hit and will definitely not be the biggest hit of the year, as director Sajid Khan has been shouting from the rooftop, but it’s truly deplorable that such a silly film would hit anything other than a dead end. Add to it the sexist jokes, the slapathons, the racist overtones... yes, we are truly ashamed.

Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani (2009): Ranbir Kapoor has admitted that he didn’t believe in this film and it’s clear why. While Ranbir and Katrina do make a super jodi, the Rajkumar Santoshi film is plain dumb. Only the rom bits (the Pritam songs) in this rom com work. The com is so not happening it’s not funny. The ajab moment? Hitchhiker Jesus with a sheep as laptop in an old Matador. Christ!

Singh is Kinng (2008): The mammoth hit from Anees Bazmee thrived on sheer stupidity. The characters were dimwitted and so was the film. Most of the punchlines didn’t pack a punch. The super eye candy songs (thanks, Kats) saved the day. The biggest irritants? Jaaved Jaaferi and Ranvir Shorey. The lowpoint? The fountain of pee that made the Khiladi’s fans go hee hee hee.

HeyY Babyy (2007): Nothing personal, Sajid. You should be happy that you have the knack of delivering box-office hits with such bad films. We sure cannot. Be happy that is. Potty-full diapers flying in the air in slo-mo is your idea of ‘clean’ fun? Sorry, but it stinks. Maybe it’s time for you to take a page out of your sister Farah’s book of filmi fun.

Krrish (2006): Yes, yes it’s a children’s film and Hrithik is his usual terrific self but now try and sit through this Rakesh Roshan biggie without fast forwarding. Remember the Kalicharan ghost and that sequence in the Singapore zoo with the chimp? A couple of decades back we would have loved it. In 2006, it was silly. Now, it’s aaaargh.

Waqt (2005): Bollywood has made many a nyaka film but this one takes the bakery. Baap is dying and beta is going to the dogs (literally). Director Vipul Shah’s Gujarati stage roots surface unabashedly and make us cringe. Remember Big B’s never-say-die dying scene? Only Ashok Kumar’s Clerk shocker comes close. Time stood still with this one. Excruciatingly.

Mujhse shaadi karogi (2004): David Dhawan is the maharaj of mindless hits (some very enjoyable, we must admit) but this one was sad. Set in Goa with more bikini babes than Miami, it was just too wannabe and with DD’s OTT set-pieces packed back-to-back, it made us disappear deep into our popcorn bowl.

Andaaz (2003): Wonder how Priyanka Chopra feels when she looks back at this early effort. The Suneel Darshan-produced Raj Kanwar-directed love triangle is the baap and maa of all things cheesy. Akshay in that red kurta, with Lara behind him and Priyanka in front of him gives a fair picture of their andaaz, right?

Raaz (2002): We go after Ram Gopal Varma for his Phoonk flicks, but Vikram Bhatt had got away with this spirited stew long back. Copied frame for frame from What Lies Beneath, this was one long furniture advertisement with Bipasha and Dino as the wooden showpieces.

Gadar (2001): For a long time, this Anil Sharma movie was our biggest hit ever. Chhi chhi! This decibel-defying noise of a film had then struck the right jingoism jangle but the horror images that have survived a decade on are a screaming Sunny Deol, a crying Ameesha Patel, a glaring Amrish Puri and, again, a screaming Sunny Deol.

Comeon Guys...let's hear it from everyone...have fun in coming up with your own stink list of the decade (one movie for each year) and after everyone has had their say, we can comeup with the RL worst movie of the decade award !!